Tony Da Costa
The Runner’s Two-Factor Equation (1/2)
Updated: Jan 21, 2021
Thanks to the analysis of Fabien Marchand, all Runners who were accompanied by him were diagnosed to have this two-factor equation.
This equation applies to past romantic (or affection) relationships, that is to say, those before the encounter with their twin flames. To find out whether this equation concerns you or not, I encourage you to analyze your past relationships along with this reading to see if you have or not implemented this exact equation to them. I urge you to rethink your past romantic relationships, even if you think of yourself to be a Chaser.
To properly analyze it, recall your past romantic relationships… those before the encounter with your Twin Flame. For example, you can pick that one romantic relationship that took place just before you met him or her.
It is important to mention that a Runner will systematically reestablish this equation to every single one of his future romantic relationships after fleeting or ending the relationship with his or her Chaser.
It is part of his behavioral system (or systèmie):
“I fear rejection.”
“I fear suffering.”
“I fear not being compatible.”
“I fear not being good enough for him or her.”
“I'm afraid that one day he or she rejects me.”
You’ll note and this equation will show well the reverse ego the Runner profile has.
The First Factor
Let us take a female Runner to illustrate. She meets a future potential partner. Right from the start, she will attempt to detect whether or not the first factor is present here: “What does this future potential spouse feel for me?” She would think.
In fact, Runners will always focus on the behavior of others, observe others, to detect what others wish, or would like to hear from them. This chameleon-like skill or ability of mimicry calls for empathy, which is obviously a quality part of the Yin polarity, thus the Runner profile. In our example, she calls upon her empathy to detect what this future potential partner wishes to hear or expects from her and thus adapts.
“What does he or she feel for me?”
“How does he or she see me?”
“Does he or she already appreciate me? Just in case, I will do a little bit more to make this potential partner appreciate me even more.”
“If he or she does not appreciate me enough, I will do a little bit more to see whether there is a 'way'….”
Voilà the first factor in the love equation of the Runner profile.
The detection of the first factor takes place through empathy, a search through intimate conviction for that which the other person would like to hear from him.
So expectedly, there can be found:
“I’m not within me, I'm not trying to find out how I feel about him. No, I'm trying to find out how the other person feels about me.”
This self-externalization automatically leads one to the search for the following information:
“Does this future potential partner already cares about me?”
The first factor can be summed up by:
“Does the other love me more than I love him?”
Evidently, it is impossible to expect that one would feel love for another person right from the start. However, it is entirely credible if one feels some kind of appreciation, possibly some admiration, or even some sort of attraction for the other. Those being physical, behavioral, gestural, voice-related admiration, or attraction. It doesn't really matter. The Runner profile grants too much importance to everything related to physical appearance, bodily expression, anything related to the physical envelope. Because the Runner profile accords too much importance to these criteria, there must not be anything that could “stain” the way he sees the other. It must be impeccable, pretty, beautiful, otherwise “the packaging” will not please them.
This is why the future partner must look at him or her with eyes that hold benevolent, reassuring, and protective.
The Runner profile will therefore attempt to detect: “Does the other love me more, does the other already care about me more than I care about him or her?”… For the Runner, finding a positive answer to this question, allows him to dream of a soothing, dreamy, and phantasmagoric future relationship… in brief, finding in it everything he or she loves.
So the first factor is about “detecting if the other is already attached to him or her, more than he or she is.”
Three vectors or reasons behind the first factor
The First Vector is evidently provoked by the rejection wound. The Runner, as you may already know, does not wish to relive the wound of rejection. So, by knowing that the other person has feelings for him or her, he or she reduces that risk by half, since he or she will be able to say to themselves: “My partner will not reject me as he or she loves me more than I love him or her.” Therefore this is some kind of first reassurance to be able to answer "yes" to this question. By knowing that her partner will not reject her, that the other will not break up with her any time soon, she feels reassured about the immediate future. The Runner profile well aware of his or her own adaptability skill ensures that no risk of falling in love with the other occurs. This is the first vector behind the first factor. The Runner will always make sure to choose future partners who will love him or her more than he or she will love them back to prevent the triggering of their rejection wound in them.
The Second Vector is the need to know that he will not suffer emotionally from this relationship. As you might have already understood, the Runner profile does not love the other person, he loves the way the other looks at him. So, if a breakup should happen one day, it is certain that it will come from the Runner rather than from his partner. The Runner profile will thus be ensuring that he will not suffer emotionally from that breakup, as he feels no love for his partner. The problem is that unfortunately, all that happens without him being aware of it, of course. It is driven by his subconscious that the Runner acts this way. He avoids any situation that may scare him and this induces many unconscious behaviors. He acts under his systemic behavior, believing them to be based on his empathy, guidance, and intuition when in fact he is being guided by his fears. His behavior will be dictated mainly by the following thoughts: “I am scared," I am not scared.” Assuming that his new relationship could eventually come to an end, the Runner has made sure he would not suffer from it, so he will not be scared to start it.
The Third Vector is the need for sovereignty. He needs sovereignty, which means having the power to decide anything by himself. This profile is by the way a fervent defender of free will. The Runner loves his freedom to come and go as he wants, when he wants, do whatever he wants, and as he wants. Of course, he can decide whether or not to be in a relationship with someone, but in the Twin Flames dynamic, that decision is not really up to him. Of course, he tries to get over his twin flame, however, since the relationship is tied to a karmic contract, he feels that whatever he tries to do in his life is not turning out smoothly. In other words, the Runner thinks in the following way: “As long as my partner holds a kind and protective look about me, I will love him... but when I need freedom, he must let me do whatever I want to do.” This attitude may sometimes be accepted by some partners, but not by his Chaser. Even if it a regular relationship, and it should become too intrusive for the Runner, he will end it. For him, he is the arbiter in the relationship. He is the one who decides whether or not he is looking forward to the other's company. Upon the loss of his freedom, the Runner will end it by invoking any pretext. So, if you have noted that you have always ended your past relationships before your partner did and making you feel rejected by him, you are probably the Runner in your Twin Flame couple. IN short, this third vector can be summed up by “As soon as the relationship becomes too intrusive, I will put an end to it, guaranteeing that my partner will not have the power to make me change my mind, as I do not love him.” His or her partner’s point of view will not change the Runner’s mind as his only desire is to end the relationship with him and he does not love his partner, after all, and that will make it easy to end the relationship. Even though the Runner does not love his partner, he can still say, “I love the way my partner looks at me.” “I love the security my partner provides me, but I do not love him or her.” So it is always the Runner who decides, who sets the pace in the relationship. It is the Runner who decides whether or not the relationship will happen.
In summary, the Runner seeks to detect whether or not the other loves him rather than detect if he loves the other for three vectors or reasons:
He does not want to feel rejected.
He wants to be certain that there is almost no chance he will suffer.
He wants to be able to end the relationship whenever he wishes to without feeling guilty.
There are several fears in his systemic behavioral pattern:
The fear of rejection.
The fear of feeling possessed and imprisoned in a relationship.
The fear of suffering.
Faced with these multiple fears, the Runner profile finds himself in panic… “Who will reassure me? Not me, eh. I can't reassure myself, I don't understand myself, I don't know myself, and regularly I feel an emptiness inside me. I have to find something reassuring. It will be the way someone else looks at me that will make me feel reassured. Yes, because I see that he or she already loves me more than I love him or her.”
A male or female Runner will go through this process of looking for future potential partners who should love him or her more than he or she loves them back, simply because he is not inside himself. He will not detect that he does not love his partner. He will not detect that what he really loves is the benevolence and protection his partner provides him with.
To be continued in part two...